Osama bin Laden and one of his followers were riding on a camel when they stopped at a small town. Bin Laden gets off the camel and lifts up its tail and looks at the camel’s butt, just then a guy comes over and says, “What are you doing?”
Osama replies, “About 2 miles back I heard someone say, ‘Hey, look at the two assholes on that camel.'”
What’s the most famous coffee in Afghanistan?
Osama bin Latte
George W. Bush and Osama bin Laden are having a conversation via Al Jazeera television. Bin Laden tells George Bush, “There is no point of engaging in further war. I can see total peace in the future!”
George Bush replies, “Oh yeah and tell me what you see?”
Osama answers, “I can see New York, with new great buildings on one side and beautiful new buildings on the other side, and everything is peaceful and wonderful.”
George Bush says, “Wow is that what you see? Well I’ll tell ya what I see for the future of Afghanistan… I see a house here, a house there, a small building here and small building there, but there are signs hanging in the middle of the street.”
Osama asks, “And what do they say?”
George answers, “Hell, I don’t know. I can’t read Hebrew!”
Why doesn’t Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?
Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.
Why don’t the members of Al Qaeda go out to bars?
Because they can get bombed at home.
What’s the national bird of Afghanistan?
Do you know how we can get Osama bin Laden?
Lace a bunch of Watchtower magazines with anthrax and send the Jehovah Witnesses in after him. Those people can find anybody!